It's that time of year... The holidays are upon us and the days are cold but oh so busy. The boys are full of joy and excitement about the days ahead. The holidays are hard for me...
Over the last couple weeks I've asked over 50 kiddos about what they're thankful for or what the love most to eat at Thanksgiving. I giggled with them and told them that I was Thankful for my boys, family, friends and even them! I joked that my favorite part of Thanksgiving was eating mac and cheese, and lots of pie (I actually hate pie) I've had a ton of people ask me what my Thanksgiving plans are and I give the same standard answer... Oh, well the boys always spend Thanksgiving with their dad because I selfishly want Christmas Eve and Christmas morning with my boys (This is VERY true) I don't have family here for us to celebrate with so its only right that they celebrate with their dad, then they can be with aunts, uncles and cousins.
But, if i'm honest I don't want it like that. I want to be able to offer them those things. I miss planning a menu, shopping for ingredients and cooking a huge feast of our own. I was actually really good at it believe it or not. The boys and I have planned a breakfast feast just the 4 of us. It's exciting and i know they're excited its just not the same. Late morning their dad will come and pick them up and the house will go silent. I'll likely cry and then realize that i need to pull it together this is now my life. I know that this won't be my forever and i know that one day i'll plan those large get togethers and have a house full of laughter but for now this is it. I wouldn't change anything about my life path because I'm happier than I've been in a very long time and know only great things are coming for myself and the boys.
I'm blessed with incredible friends and will be spending time with some of them later in the day. It won't make me miss my boys any less but i'm thankful for them! I truly have so many things to be thankful for this year, I am beyond blessed!
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