Do You Know ME? Really Know ME?

So, i decided to sit down and text 10 of my closest friends the following text:

Okay, so i'm going to do a blog post about me... Yes, me, i know how selfish... but here's my question: when you think of Mary Beth what comes to mind?

This is what they had to say...

My First response came from Lauren:

Kind 

Selfless

Spunky

Creative

Careful

Loving

Fashion forward

Minamilst (except for clothes and Shoes)

Friend

Puts others needs first (selfless)

Quiet until comfortable

Likes the Zoo (thanks for that one, you should come sometime)

Spontaneous

My second response came from Cassie:

Strong

Selfless

Beautiful

Patient

Loving

Giving

Forgiving

Creative

Complicated (she mentioned why but ill share that later)

My third response came from Michelle (my sister):

Best Friend

Mom

Sister

Beauty

My fourth response came from Sahana:

Mom

Giving

Active

Easy going

My fifth response came from Mike:

Kind

Very loyal

Beautiful

Friendly

Funny

My sixth response came from Valerie:

Fiercely loyal

Wonderful mother

Devoted

Selfless

Beautiful on the outside but even more beautiful on the inside

Strong in ways very few people know

My seventh response came from Katie (my sister):

Super Stylish

Excellent Friend

My eighth response came from Dave:

You have to answer that one yourself (i should have known asking a psychologist that questions that's how he'd respond)

My ninth response came from Cherie:

Beautiful Heart

Christian

Best Friend

Loyal to the end

Selfless

Most loving dedicated mommy

Adventurous

Sexy

Fun

Lots of laughter

Ed Sheehan (someones going to cringe at this)

Moscato

Pedi's and Panang

Bicycle

Brookfield Zoo

Shedd Aquarium

Beautiful

Organized

Clean beautiful home

There's just so many things Cherie says that it would take her all day

My tenth never arrived...

Looking over this list i see a lot of things in common,  But, one thing i noticed thats missing is RUNNING, come on friends this is something i do every day!  Joking aside I love who i am!  I love how authentic i am and how i come off to others.  I have walked a journey not everyone will experience but that doesn't make me special.  It only makes me who i am.  What adjectives would i use to describe myself...

Honest

Loyal

Loving

Mother

Sister

Daughter

Beauty inside and out

Athletic

Spontaneous

Classy

Graceful

Clumsy

Simple

Sexy

Patient

Forgiving

Creative

Intelligent

Guarded

Strong

Love who you are and don't be afraid to know who you are.  Don't Judge me, if you want to know my story just ask... You might be surprised.

Be UNstoppable!

Most Girls are smart, strong and beautiful... be unstoppable, fight to make everyday.  I want to be like most girls but, at the same time i want to be just like ME.  We live in a world of so many stereotypes.  No two girls are the same and don't let anyone box you in.  Be UNstoppable!

I don't fit the typical mom stereotype and thats something i love about myself.  I'm comfortable in my own skin and hold my head high.  I want my boys to see me as a strong women/mom that can do it all.  Sometimes i want to crumble but i just keep pushing and moving forward.  Be UNstoppable!

Shakes you to the core

Sometimes, you find something that shakes you to the core.  Something that breaks you down in a way you didn't realize possible anymore.  The admission of pain, selfishness and the torture they knew you endured at the hands of someone who said they'd love you

Relationships are strange like that.  There are so many different types of relationships, all with different purposes.  The definition of a relationship is: the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.

So, lets step back for a second...

This past weekend i had the pleasure of attending my baby sisters wedding.  For the record it was a beautiful day and Katie looked incredibly gorgeous.  I'm So SO proud of the women that shes become.  During the reception a speech was given and during it they spoke of being inside the inner circle of someones love.  The safety and security.  They said that now Katie is inside that circle.  It just makes me realize that if you don't have that inner circle it can be scary.

There is something about knowing that no matter what you tell someone, how you feel or act you'll always be loved. Knowing you're loved no matter what and someone always has your back. It takes a lot to break that circle.  I'm so happy for my baby sister that she's found that with Nick her new husband.

I can remember as a child just wanting to feel safe and loved.  I never wanted to shake the boat or cause waves.  I just wanted to be inside the circle. Now as an adult i have lots of circles.  They're all safe circles but none of them fully fulfill me the way i want and need.  Sometimes i wonder what that will look like and if i'll ever truly find it.  Am i already inside that circle or on the edge of entering that circle? Only time will tell but some days its harder to sit back and be patient.

Earlier today i was working on some PTA stuff and as many of you know i like to stay organized so i was creating a file.  While going through the old files and clearing out what i didn't need i found a hand written letter that brought me to tears instantly.  The words hit deep and stopped me in my tracks.  Things like this make me realize that i am an incredible person to have in someones inner circle.  My time will come!

And a side note, today i ran into one of my favorite people at swim team practice.  Its one of my friends dad... he always has a story for me and tons of advice.  Oh and he always greets me with hows the most beautiful lady i know doing on this great day?  so that helps.