GIRL...Stop Your Crying

GIRL, get it together and STOP your crying.  It's amazing that one persons actions can cause me to crumble so easily. 

 Let me start from the beginning.  I've worked very hard to create a safe capsule for not only myself but my boys.  But then one person breaks into that space and decides they want to be inside that safe space.  Sneaking around, not telling anyone what they're doing all along knowing this will devastate me bringing me to my knees. The old me would tighten that capsule making it smaller and closing us in.  Not this time, I don't have to put up with this...  I'm happier than I've been in a VERY long time.  I've met someone that bring me joy and I see more with.  I think that maybe this has been sensed and therefore this breaker is grasping for what he can to stay relevant.  This won't work my friend.  My life is moving on and forward without you.  You can continue to one up me with things but i'll ultimately win with LOVE and TIME!

Do not repay evil or insult with insult.

On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because

to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.

1 Peter 3:9

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.

Proverbs 31:25

For I know the plans i have for you.

Jeremiah 29:11

The wise women builds her house,

but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.

Proverbs 14:1

The Lord God said, "It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky.  He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name.  So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping he took one of the man's ribs and the closed up the flesh.  Then the Lord God made a women from the rib he had taken out of the man and he brought her to the man.  The man said, "This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man.  That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, they become one flesh.

Genesis 2:18-24

The word is something that comforts me in times of need.  I can open my heart and cry out about anything.  Knowing that i'm not being judged and loved and that with patience his will, will be done.  His love is endless for me AND my BOYS and i just need to have HOPE!

That Look of Judgement...

If you're a parents you know that look.  That look of judgement that the person who is giving it doesn't even realize they're giving it sometimes, other times they just give it to shame you!  You may even give that look often yourself, unknowingly.  I'm sure i'm guilt.  But...I was especially guilty before I had children of my own, before I was a single mother, or even before I was honest about my truth.

I can remember being fresh out of school with my first class of my very own; and boy did i make some judgments.  I was going to be such a better parent.  My children were going to eat all of their vegetables and even think carrots were candy.  If a child was screaming or tantruming in public I thought, YIKES!  My child would never behave like that because we would have a clear understanding who the boss really was... ME of course.  

Now if you're a parent you know very well that no matter how many books you read or no matter how calm you are and talk sweetly to your little love, if they want to Tantrum they're going to tantrum.  The same goes with life, things are out of our control most of the time and there isn't a thing we can do about it.  You can go around putting band aids on things and handing DUM DUMS to your child to silence them to take some of the embarrassment and shame away.  The reality is if you're honest with yourself we've all been there.  This thing called life isn't perfect, and we have to STOP judging each other.  Just embrace it, and smile and give a nod the next time you see a mom struggling with her 2 year old in the grocery store or maybe even her 10 year old.

We don't know all the circumstances that brought someone to their current place in life or why that child is acting out.  Not only may the mother or father be struggling with something but that child might also be dealing with an internal struggle as well.  So, STOP shaming each other! 

I've really learned to embrace my life as a single mother (This was something that was very hard for me at first, I thought it was like the scarlet letter) and own it with confidence (Sometimes I still feel a little out of place, but I've made great strides) But there is still that moment in a conversation when you say, oh my boys are with their dad or i don't have my boys today.  The persons face freezes and they realize OH, You're DIVORCED!  Yes, I am divorced and it was the one thing I said I would NEVER be.  But, with that you don't know my journey, you don't know the countless times I tried to fix things, or the times I felt shame because of it.  God only know what I've been through, and God only knows what they say about me.  But I know what I say about myself and I'm proud of who I've become.  My journey is NOT over and many chapters are still to come.  

This post comes from a place of LOVE and GRACE, extend grace to those around YOU! Music has always spoken to me, in happy moments and sad moments.  This song was one of the many...  

I Hope they see the strength, and courage.

LOVE and LISTEN we NEED each other