A couple nights ago i started to panic, I started to fear the feeling of being alone. I texted one of my closest friends (she knows everything, and i'm not afraid to be myself with her) and I shared my fears. I told her I scheduled the surgery, I told her I wasn't afraid of the surgery or the outcome. Its a hard thing to explain without sounding like i want sympathy. But, here it is... It's the time when you arrive home and the house is silent, no one to call out to, no one asking you what you need. I've been through this before but not completely alone. I'm always the one caring for others but, sometimes I want to be taken care of. I don't have a mother offering to help, the boys will be well taken care of and happy with their dad. Cassie was quick to offer to come and be here with me, but i assured her as much as i would love to have her here i could handle this. This is my battle, this is my life, just another part of my story line. There is always that fear in my heart, even when my world shakes and I think I can't take another thing, I persevere and come out stronger!
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